Topic-icon Indian's dating Coloured woman

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13 years 6 months ago #42356 by Camy
Is it because i am fair with some indian features? Is it cos i can cook? Or is it cos i'm coloured? hello....i am coloured therefore i have allot of culture within me. I am proud of it.
I have 2 ex bf's who are indian. 1 very short term, and 1 was for a year. the first 1 well it ended cos he only wanted one thing that it seems most indian men think only coloured woman can give them, he even lied about he's age to get with me. The second one well i'm still trying to figure him out, we've been apart for 7 months now, he claims to still be in love with me but i've never met he's parents, never been to he's hometown and if we were to get married expects me to change my religion to hinduism.
My point is, why start the relationship to begin with? Why come with me to church and expect me to change my religion for the sake of getting married and live happily ever after? what do you see me for mr. indian guy? what do you want from me? why pursue me just to break my heart?
he's a sweet guy, i give him that, respectful and treats a woman well, but i'm being realistic in that it wont get anywhere my kids and i cannot go through that aimlessness. For what! not only that the looks you get, the remarks etc....and every coloured guy that see's you with an indian guy wants to get da crew together and beat him up for taking one of their stekkie's. what is it? tell me? someone shed some light???

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13 years 6 months ago #42358 by DuranO
Camy wrote:

the remarks etc....and every coloured guy that see's you with an indian guy wants to get da crew together and beat him up for taking one of their stekkie's. what is it? tell me? someone shed some light???


errrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm heres the thing. i have enough chaar ou bra's. they dont respect coloured women. i know lots of indians that date coloured chicks but how many of them actually marry coloured girls. it always later becomes an issue of their parents or religion (thats at least 95% of the time). so maybe when they start marrying our coloured stekkies...... we'll stop wanting to kick their asses. interracial relationships dont bother me coz i know some coloured guys dont take care of their own women... the issue i have is chaar ou's messing with coloured chicks and then leaving them........... thats a big issue for me

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13 years 6 months ago #42359 by casinouva
Q1- best rated looking women in the world.
Q2- most cultured women in the wolrd.
Q3- Most strong willed women in the world.
Q4- Mots self empowered women in the world.
Q5- Most preffered women between colourd, white, black, indian

Answer........

COLOURD

need i say more
B)

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13 years 6 months ago #42360 by lester
True that...a lot of Indian men are not interested in marrying Coloured women and just believe that they are easy (note I said a lot and not all). There are obviously those who are genuine and sincere but because of the bad seeds, Coloured women will approach cautiously...at least you would think. There are those Coloured women who date Indian guys just for their money too...let me say though that this trait is not just common to Coloured women as you get White women doing this too.

On the flipside, why do Indian women think that Coloured guys are gangsters and women beaters and are scared to even give you the time of day?

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13 years 6 months ago #42362 by bmw325
I think this issue has been reversed with our coloured brothers who have also started dating Indian girls. I agree the indian guys will never take the girl to meet family because they like to keep everything in the family.

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13 years 6 months ago #42363 by lester
BMW325 - are you serious? I have never heard of that scenario.

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13 years 6 months ago #42365 by Camy
i suppose it's all generalising. yes you can be open minded you can "see" what happens or where it takes you but then you in too deep. we try not to generalise but it's instilled in us, i questioned this indian guy i dated allot, i asked y all da time, it's like he's been brainwashed in how things must be and if he dissapoints he's mother then he would be damned for life or burn in hell or something they truly believe this....scary sh*t. anyway. here's an example of the mindsets....you driving happily along...a taxi just cuts infront of you, no indicator no hand signals almost caused a moerse accident...would you look at any taxi driver the same again?
it is sad that people all over think that all coloureds come from capetown, all coloureds drink for a living and consider clubbing a necessity in life. or that they all beat up their woman. but this comes from their experiences or what they've been told from a very young age. same with us as to what we think about the indian's how they treat bruin stekkies, how greasy they are, or whatever. we got to all stop generalising.....Respect and be respected......Love and be loved....can we do it....who knows.

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13 years 6 months ago #42366 by shadesofme
I agree with all the negative stuff you have said about indian men. And fo sho it is true. i dated one for 7 years. he was a liar, a cheat and in the latter years a woman beater(those sly ones that hit you on your body not on your face so nobody knows). i loved the ou, what can i say. I am not proud of it...now looking back. But yes, a coloured chic is never good enough for an Indian guy's family. I was not willing to lose myself in order to gain respect from them. I dared to remain true to who I was. I respected them, cos that is all i owed them. I was a victim of their slander, their "bushman" jokes. I subjected my self to ridicule and talking behind my back when i walked out of the room. my son with this guy (although loved by them now) was called names because his hair wasn't too straight. My son has lovely curly hair, i dont see anything wrong with that.But char ou's are like that, hey. The only thing they were happy is his light colouring.Cos they are very dark.
If i could advise anyone, i would say "dont touch them with a ten foot pole" Look to be fair, there may be a few indian guys out there. But thats just it...there are just a few spread out far and wide. i will certainly not go back that way again. I painfully learnt my lesson.

Hey I can cook better than most indian people I know anyhow. My bushman mother taught me. I just dont need to prove anything anymore.

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13 years 6 months ago #42367 by Chyna Doll
Camy wrote:

I have 2 ex bf's who are indian. 1 very short term, and 1 was for a year. the first 1 well it ended cos he only wanted one thing that it seems most indian men think only coloured woman can give them


Every guy that i have ever dated has been indian, pure coincidence.. that is 3 long term relationships, where one actually ended up with me breaking of an engagement.

At the end of the day, my hair was not straight enough, i was not smart enough or rich enough for the guys that i dated but for their families. I have learnt the hard way that indian guys are so spoilt by their family that they would rather cut of their noses and spite their faces before they go against their parents wishes.

Its cruel but reality...

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13 years 6 months ago #42368 by suger/spice
:kiss:
I agree 100% with what ur saying, cause why should it always be coloured ladies changing their religion? Whats wrong with the Hot spices huh? They just wanna use us women and play us to cool.....and of cause who's gonna want us when they done with us. Hot spices never want us.....they r just waiting untill we fall in luv with them, than they'll leave us for the one they think should marry them. So my coloured sista's.....stick with ur man.....don't go changing ur colour for something els......

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13 years 6 months ago #42369 by HoneyBabe
casinouva wrote:

Q1- best rated looking women in the world.
Q2- most cultured women in the wolrd.
Q3- Most strong willed women in the world.
Q4- Mots self empowered women in the world.
Q5- Most preffered women between colourd, white, black, indian

Answer........

COLOURD

need i say more
B)


I see why you called casinouva!

Im just not attracted to Indian guys at all. Nothing puts me more off than an Indian guy. Besides being repulsed by the hair and the attitude, I've seen too many of my friends (white, black and coloured) get into "my parents don't approve of me dating you" scenarios.
Even a coloured male friend of mine was dumped last week by her parents cos he wasn't good enough. A good education with a degree, manners, respect wasn't good enough....mmmm :whistle:

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13 years 6 months ago #42370 by CheeZy
Well my ex gf is indian and I must say they do treat a guy rite, however wit indian chics its totally different, everythin must be the way they want it, they like to be in control with everythin. This is jus my point of view. "I'm not sayin all indian chics are crack heads jus a little craskish":evil: :evil: :evil:

But guys on a serious note every relationship has its ups and downs, no matter what race u are or what race u date...

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13 years 6 months ago #42371 by Dylan
To me this is less a race thing than it is a guy thing. There are guys that are dogs of all races. There are good guys of all races.
All these experiences you guys have had with Indians, dont tell me you haven't had worse with coloureds...
The parents might be their issue, we have ours...

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13 years 6 months ago #42373 by DirtyRadz
I've got indian friends who openly admit that they use coloured women but will only ever marry an indian woman...

The problem is that coloured women are seen as loose by all races (black,white and indian) and thats why they dont get respect from these other races

Most coloured women give it up too easy and too often and now its the guys problem for not respecting them.

There are a few good coloured women out there with some morals and values but they suer are hard to find

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13 years 6 months ago #42376 by shadesofme
oh puhlease! that is an indian perception. it is not true. i live in Durban and while you will always find loose girls in any race, there are so many good, moral girls-in fact plenty that dont give it up easily. And i am sure in the rest of SA too. if indian men think that of coloured woman then too bad for them. i am one of those people that dont like people to talk nonsense about Coloureds. i lift us up wherever i go. so please dont now start agreeing with ignorant people. there is nothing wrong with coloured girls. some of the most wonderful and even natured people are coloured girls. and they dont give it up easily...not anymore than any other race.

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13 years 6 months ago #42378 by Niqa
DirtyRadz in my most humble opinion I think you are just looking in the wrong places. There a lots of good coloured women out there. Coloured women are always considered loose or promiscuous for having a healthy sexual appetite...guys are never guilty of giving it up too easily.....

It's Coloured men like yourself that encourage this negative stereotype of Coloured women...that is why Indian, White, Black and Coloured men for that matter think they can treat us like that.

For a person that has been in a relationship with an Indian man for four years, I have first hand experience of what it's like. You constantly walk in fear of being ridiculed. Up until today I have never met my partners parents. It hurts like hell feeling like a dirty secret.

Eventually the reality of the difference in culture, religion, etc. must kick in....for me that time is now!! There are just too many things which can stand in the way of marital bliss. For some it works for others it doesn't, it all depends on the individuals.

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13 years 6 months ago #42379 by shadesofme
you sound like an intelligent chic Niqa. Please explain why u are still in this relationship if the man hasn't even presented you to his parents. i say 'presented" and not 'introduced' for a reason. what future do you think you have with someone like that?

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13 years 6 months ago #42380 by Niqa
As I said reality has kicked in and I realised there can be no future for us...It took me along time to realise it, but I have.....obviously it's not easy, but what kind of life would we have, if I'm not accepted into his family and he won't accept mine!

He wouldn't present me to his family simply because I am a Christian - something they would never accept! In addition to that, I made it clear from day one I will never change!

Truth be told, I don't know why I stuck it out for so long or why I allowed it to get this far....

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13 years 6 months ago #42381 by Camy
i'm so glad i got so much response out of everyone, the ex indian guy is trying to get me back i keep asking him what is the point, i mean where wud it lead he cant say accept he will try. cant believe i was thinking about it, i suppose him wanting to come up to jhb this weekend was just to get a somethin somethin outta me, he must be missing it BIG TIME. i suppose as a single mom you feel more vulnerable, you feel alone and like second best, i mean who wants you with your kids (baggage to allot of ppl) i'm not look for a daddy for my kids, i'm looking for someone who love and respect me and my kids for all that we are. curly hair n all n all.
Keepit real sista's! let's just stick to our own kind, and seek to find our match among us.

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13 years 6 months ago #42382 by clockworkorange
Like Dylan said it hardly has anything to do with the race of the person. Dirty rotten scoundrels come all colours.

I date whoever tickles my fancy. I could care less what his ethnicity is as long as he respects me and loves me for who i am regardless of my ethnicity.

Camy, you made a point about 'keeping it real' by sticking to one's race. I keep it real everytime i date anyone who isn't coloured.

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